Apr 24 2008
Naruto -Shippuuden- The Movie
So finally the movie that was hyped last year is out and I guess it’s too late for me to fangirl about it, as all I have left for Naruto is incredibly contempt and awful sarcasm. Oh well that should make this blog entry somewhat amusing to read.
So the movie started when our token FFC (fugly filler character in case you forgot) shows up, slices his stomach open (or as he says “performs surgery”) and then lets some demonic spirit come inside. He then quickly sews it back up and it’s good as new! No blood no pain nothing! Imagine that! What money organ transplant patients could save if this were possible! He then sends out his team of FFC Minions to go and kill some miko who has the power to seal up the demon that is inside him.
His FFC Minions aren’t just any minions. They’re tentacle snake minions because they were injected with tentacle snakes and that’s the only reason they actually have any powers! In all seriousness, the amount of gross in this movie was appalling. I mean I really didn’t need to see some guy slice himself open and then a shitload of tentacle snakes spewing through people’s skin. 
So anyway the minions go off and also a CG army of statues is summoned to do nothing but destroy forests and later play with Naruto’s clones.
Meanwhile back at the ranch, Naruto is acting like a total dumbass as always and he, Sakura, Neji and Lee are summoned together to go on a mission to protect the miko, whose name is Shion By the way. Needless to say Naruto bitches about it at first but is forced to go along anyway. I gotta say though, this movie made Neji look pretty cool. I mean I feel like he got pretty shafted fighting himself in the manga/anime 2nd part but at least he got to shine in the movie. Naruto on the other hand (who used to be my favorite character) suddenly pissed me off and I impatiently waited for Sakura to punch him on multiple occasions.
So when they finally get to (insert whatever the fuck filler village they made up for this movie) and rescue Shion, guess what? She’s a fucking ungrateful bitch. I mean this is beyond tsundere level. I seriously wanted someone to slap her at least once in this movie, but sadly no one did. I did praise Naruto for yelling some sense into her when she said “oh yea that guy’s a dumbass, he goes and dies for me LOL 
” Needless to say she was a stupid cunt until the end where she saw Naruto’s beautiful sparkly hair like in a shampoo commercial and suddenly she got all deredere and STFU.
The rest of the movie was pretty much fighting, fighting, more fighting, clones and rasengans. Like I said before, Neji was ちょカッコイイ and seeing him do that 64 hit combo was pretty awesome. Lee and Sakura just punched rocks a lot, that’s about all I remember. I’m surprised Sakura put up with that stupid miko bitch - she took out all her frustration on Naruto instead. 
Anyway eventually they reach the volcano (yes the fucking bad guy was sitting in the middle of a freaking volcano).
There a bunch of random shit happens and Shion remember her mom sacrificing stuff. There’s also flashbacks throughout the movie where Shion had a ronery childhood like Naruto because nobody wanted to play with her due to the fact that if they became her friend - they’d eventually end up dying for her. Gee that sucks even more than Naruto’s situation if you think about it! So anyway she realizes that marble pin her mom gave her actually has pretty awesome power! Too bad a shitload of people died before she realized this.
So then she attempts to use her powers and crap, and there’s lots of shiny lights and then she gives her protection power on to Naruto so that he doesn’t get tentacle stabbed like in the first 5 minutes of the movie. She’s in this weird dream/flashback state until Naruto snaps her out of it and is like “BITCH, I’M NOT DYING, AND YOU’RE NOT DYING NOW LET’S MAKE A RASENGAN OF LOVE!” So they make this stupid huge ass rasengan and blow everything up.
When the credits roll all they show is the stupid volcano and smoke. I mean come on wtf? Also some dumb hawaiinish-japanese song plays. Once the stupid credits end there’s a short bit that suddenly shows that Shikamaru, Temari and Kakashi were around. Hey Kakashi even gets a couple of lines. Suddenly Naruto appears holding Shion and tells her that now her job is over. She says that she will continue being a miko in case something like this happens again, and after all she needs to pass her powers to the next heir. She then asks Naruto if he would like to “help her” with that.
LOL. I think only the peanut gallery understands what her request was
Don’t worry Shion, he can do you with multiple clones at once!
Tags: action packed!, flashbacks, movie, rofl, somebody dies!, tentacles, terrible sarcasm
29 Responses to “Naruto -Shippuuden- The Movie”
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akon on 
padfoot135 on 
Oh its out. I gotta go see.
10 COCKS IN 7 HOLES
HERBAL ESSENCES? XD
I WANNA WATCH I WANNA WATCH. Damn, it’s RAW …
*sigh* Oh well, at least Neji got to look good.
um what happened with the grave? in the trailer there was a grave… and sakura screaming naruto’s name. o___o
Neji is the only saving grace in this series for me.
Liinae> it was like the first 5 min of the movie and apparently it was just some vision by Shion rather than something that actually happened. Or perhaps it was a “if Naruto died this is what would happen” lol Also the one yelling out Naruto was Shion in the movie not Sakura, although I do recall in the previews something completely different which is why I got confused myself.
“RASENGAN OF LOVE”
LOLOL….I hope you know your posts are the only thing saving Naruto for me these days. Don’t stop!
akon> Unfortunately I’ve just all but given up for the Naruto anime. I’m still keeping up with the manga though
Tenten - shafted again!
John> No wait she actually showed up for like 1 split second during a random Konoha battle!
Well the last time Tenten did something worthwhile, she ended up sprawled on the end of a giant fan, so maybe it’s better for her to fade into cameo land.
Also, I don’t think there were any flashbacks in Naruto last week. The world has gone mad. Sadly it seems that tomorrow we will find out that Itachi was really a good guy.
hehehe tentacles……..
naruto seems to always make new rasengan for every movie… the 2nd movie was the green rasengan… and the 3rd movie was i think look like the moon slightly bigger than normal rasengan.. and now, he made the super chakara rasengan OF LOVE!!!
i suppose if there’ll ever be a 5th movie.. the rasengan would be a size of a moon??? 
abit of weird for this movie.. lol… u juz see lee trashing out all his gates so quickly that i went huh??!! wtf he did?? this movie was sooo fast… that -.-” i gt nth to say…. too crap for me to comment anything else… 
btw… hino… i ment to ask about the wedding thing u’v got on the side >>
care to explain?? or did u post it up somewhere.. just that i missed it
… >.<
there IS a 5th movie. It features Sasuke so I’ll just say he’ll make the buttsecks rasengan
also I am getting married next year hence the countdown.
wow!! congratz!!! do.. post all ur wedding picture… no your wedding VIDEO for all of us!! your fans!!!
@Hinano: If you post a video, let it not be “Paris Hilton”-esq.
After that loli shot of you by the Harui poster from your last convention; I have a feeling you’ll be receiving a lot of requests.
I’m not a loli! I’m a fossil!
Also we don’t have a videographer at our wedding anyway so there won’t be any videos in the first place
LOL at the last picture.
I only watched 1 naruto movie and it was in english dub! Does Naruto get another girl to love him like every movie? 
I’ve been laughing from the first line on top of that ‘Naruto Hair’ screen cap.
I’ll be watching this sometime tomorrow…along with that new Eva movie. Something like “Eva: Not so Emo Anymore”. Never did like that show, heard it was pretty though…
This movie looks, well, stupid. I should enjoy it thoroughly. I could stand for another of Rock Lee’s “my way of the ninja” flashbacks.
I use garnier fructis personally… =\
I remember when the teasers came out the big hype was that “Naruto dies!” Now I’m mad that that was false advertising.
Oh hey, and apparently Shippuuden movie two will be about Sasuke!
totali> I actually use that too.
Blank> Yea I already knew that. I wonder if they’re gonna show that same stupid cliff scene again from the series lmao. Maybe that’s why it was widescreen?
congrads on the wedding
and try not to stress yourself
oh and even temari gota a shot more than ten ten FWT
[...] before I settled down to a nice evening in the World of Warcraft. Now, Hinano already wrote up a very extensive review of this new movie, and I was getting a bit frustrated trying to figure out how to offer my own [...]
i still cant stop laughing, ive watched it like 10 times already. lol
the end never fails to amuze me.
i hope they get together XD
rofl everytime i think about it i bust out laughing.
cuz everyone knows naruto has no clue. XDDD
man the look on kakashi and lee’s faces are priceless lol
i say naruxshion
they make a cute couple, and you can kinda tell naruto likes her :]
anyways, im jealous of shion >.>;;